A Journey of Self-Love.

Hello, all! As the cheesy title of this post suggests, I'm about to get a little personal, so if feelings and/or talking about feelings makes your skin crawl, this won't be for you.

I'm not going to delve too far into what has brought me to this point, but I feel a little back-story is necessary before I can focus on the now, and the future.
To sum up very generally, I have never been happy with myself; I can specifically remember occasions, when my age still graced the single-digit spectrum, where I would grab at myself in front of the mirror and cry. I would write lists for the fridge saying crude things such as "Sophia CAN'T eat this" or "Sophia CAN eat this", I would mentally beat myself up for eating unhealthy, I was never happy with who I was as a person. This continued through out my teenage years; I had an incredibly unhealthy relationship with myself until about six months ago, just before I turned nineteen. It was a slow change, but I started to take care of myself mentally and physically, and my body started to take care of me back, which has gradually led me to where I am now.

On my journey to self-acceptance.

I'm definitely not there yet, hence the use of the cliche 'journey', but I am getting there. There are still many things I need to accept about my self physically and mentally, and many things I would like to change for myself, but I have made a lot of progress. This post, and the one's which will hopefully follow it, are going to document my process, and hopefully help anyone who stumbles across them. This is not for sympathy, or congratulations, I should clarify; I simply would like to keep a record of what is a very important and meaningful hurdle to overcome.

In the last six months I have felt my attitude to university change, and my grades rise because of it. My 'bad days' are no longer my every days; they're still there, just less overwhelmingly so. My relationships with my friends have dramatically improved. My relationship with food has become much healthier, and I feel so much more confident in my body - I bought jeans and crop tops, this is unheard of for me. I have more motivation than ever, and I can't explain how empowering this feels.

Something that has really helped me is the 'fake it till you make it' mantra. When I'm feeling self conscious, I tell myself I'm great. When I feel shy, I tell myself that I am confident and self-assured. When I feel that I can't handle the day, I tell myself that I can of course do this, I can do anything. It sounds silly, but it works wonders, I guarantee it.

Let's work together, to accept ourselves and live happier lives.

Until next time,
Sophia ♡

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Thank you so much for reading, have a beautiful day!

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